Fuda #40 [video]

[idealism]

[Tsuzuki has wanted to avoid making this video, but he doesn't see any other way. During the weeks since Hisoka came back from his abduction, he simply hasn't fared well. He's even gotten worse, which made no sense. Now that it's gotten to the point where he can't leave the house any more, he's quickly running out of options.]

This might sound like an odd request, but... I know we have several healers in town. Who are the strongest ones?


[He looks over his shoulder to make sure Hisoka is nowhere around.]

....I suppose doctors could work, as well. The bottom line is, I need help.

Comments

[idealism]

[He doesn't want Hisoka to die. It's terrible that he's suffering and that there's nothing he can do to help him. If he could, and it would help him, he would have taken on the curse himself.

But since he can't, Tsuzuki strokes his wing tenderly.]

Sure. It's not so hard as long as you remember the combination of words.

[cynicism]

Sure. ..Just draw it for me here?

[The wing is drooping even after the touching, lacking the strength to puff out the way it normally might.]

[idealism]

[Tsuzuki takes it as a hint to lift the wing himself, so he can groom the feathers.]
Just keep in mind, when you write yours, your messenger won't look like mine. All messenger shapes are unique to the person who creates them.

[Sitting up straight, he picks a paper strip from his pocket, but he isn't too sure where he put his brush. Does that mean he has to get up?]

[cynicism]

I think yours suit you. [Another slow blink. It's hard to stay conscious for this long.]

...It reminds me of Suzaku.

[idealism]

... Thank you.

[His vision grows misty because of tears. He's grateful for what Hisoka says, but it makes the coming loss unbearable. Tsuzuki tries to smile, resting his cheek against his hair.]

I bet yours will be wonderful. Maybe it will look like a dragon. Or a wolf.

[cynicism]

[He returns the smile. It's the only thing he can think to do that would encourage Tsuzuki. His partner needs smiles.]

I'll let you know when I come back. I'll.

[His head slumps.]

..tell you.. all about the underworld.. here.

[idealism]

[Tsuzuki doesn't need smiles. He needs is Hisoka. That is why he grows worried when he sees that his partner struggles to pay attention. Tsuzuki brushes the hair away from his eyes, holding his cheek so that he won't hit himself if he faints.]

Hisoka. There's something I need you to promise me. Do you hear me?

[cynicism]

[His voice is quiet and faraway, as if it comes from a place further away than his throat.]


i hear you.

[idealism]

If you run into some trouble there, retreat. Don't attack anything if you have a way to escape.

[He hugs him close.]

Please come back to me in one piece.

[cynicism]

yeah.

course i will.

can't die if i'm already dead.

[idealism]

I mean it.

If you're gone longer than a week, I will come get you.

[cynicism]

you're a good partner.

[idealism]

You are, too. I'm really proud of you.

[cynicism]

I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you.

[idealism]

Hmm? What are you talking about?

[cynicism]

We had a fight. And you were so sad. I don't want you to be hurt. You're too important to hurt.

[idealism]

....I forgave you for that a long time ago. [He is very proud of Hisoka for this, though. Unspeakably proud. Tsuzuki gives his forehead a small peck, touching his face tenderly.] I'm sorry for hurting you, too.

[cynicism]

[He still looks asleep for all intents and purposes.]


i don't want to leave you either. i promised to stay.

[idealism]

[He rocks him gently, as if he expects Hisoka to fall asleep soon.]

You won't break any promise. You'll stay with me, in my heart.

[cynicism]

and you're in mine too. okay?

[idealism]

[It makes his eyes sting. It feels like Hisoka is saying goodbye.]

Mhm.



But you will stay for as long as you can, right?

[cynicism]

[He lets out a heavy sigh, but otherwise gives no answer, having lost his tenuous grip on lucidity.]

[idealism]

[It's only because he thinks Hisoka's unconscious that he dares to lift him up, lips barely brushing his ear as he whispers the words to him. Hisoka can't listen to his heart, so he needs to be more open with him than he usually is.]

I love you. Stay strong.