Fuda #42 [action/video]

[idealism]

[If anyone walks past house 25 today, they will notice that is looks dark and abandoned. On the front door, someone has nailed a piece of paper. It says:

Hisoka and I has moved to Community house 5, room 4 on the ground floor. Draco has gone home.

-Tsuzuki

[The room number is underlined twice.  He doesn't want anyone to come to the wrong part of the building by mistake. 

There are too many goodbyes. After a while the body simply doesn't have enough energy to grieve for all of them, no matter how much it wants to. Tsuzuki doesn't know how to deal with it just yet, but he does know that he needs to at least pretend things are fine.  That's why he takes his normal trip to the bakery and then to the temple during the rainy day.  Rei is nowhere to be found at the temple, which is a huge red flag to him.  She would have never left it without telling anyone.  He does his best to make the temple stay clean and welcoming while he waits for her to come back.

When he goes to his new home, he makes sure to bring some real green and some snacks for Hisoka, as a way to try to cheer him up.]

Sorry about the mess.  Do you want some help with the unpacking?

[Once he's hung his coat to dry, he opens his journal and presses the video function.]

I see we've gotten some more new people in town.  How are you all settling in?

Comments

[Action]

[idealism]

Sure. It keeps my mind off of other things.

But I miss the old gardens. What's the point of starting new ones if you never get to see how things grow?

[Action]

[cynicism]

It's a small enough village. Why can't you just walk over there?

[Action]

[idealism]

I can't do that. It's someone else's garden now.

[Action]

[cynicism]

That's silly.

[Action]

[idealism]

That's just how things are.

Anyway. Why are you so interested in whether or not I fix the garden?

[Action]

[cynicism]

[He shrugs]

It's something that made you happy. You haven't been happy lately.

[Action]

[idealism]

[His wings fold themselves on his back, making him look smaller.]

Are you sure it's not your own unhappiness you're feeling?

[Action]

[cynicism]

I know the difference between what's mine and what's yours.

[Action]

[idealism]

[He just knows he'll regret asking.]

What's the difference?

[Action]

[cynicism]

[ ... ]

I don't know how to explain it with words.

[Action]

[idealism]

You can try, if you want. I promise not to say anything.

[Action]

[cynicism]

You feel different than I do. ...That's all.

[There's not a language he knows to express matters of the spirit.]

[Action]

[idealism]

[He knows that. That's what got them into this trouble in the first place.]

Do all people feel different, or do some feel the same?

[Action]

[cynicism]

Everyone's got a different spirit. I've never seen an identical one.

[Action]

[idealism]

What do spirits look like to you?

[Action]

[cynicism]

Like spirits.

[what kind of question is that?]

[Action]

[idealism]

[Tsuzuki is quiet, before he looks to his partner.]


Is it difficult to find the right words sometimes, 'Soka?

[Action]

[cynicism]

Only when you ask about things that there aren't words to describe.

[Action]

[idealism]

I am not asking to annoy you. I guess I just want to know what things look like from your perspective.

Re: [Action]

[cynicism]

They look the same way they always look. I don't know how you get along your way.

When I didn't have my powers, everything looked weird.

[Action]

[idealism]

I can imagine. [He adjusts the way he sits, leaning a little closer.]

What was the worst thing about not having your empathy?

[Action]

[cynicism]

Everything.

[He'll meet Tsuzuki halfway and lean toward him, resting his head on his partner's shoulder.]

[Action]

[idealism]

[It's a little surprising and a little good at the same time. Tsuzuki always feels calmer when there's some kind of physical contact to remind him that he's not alone. He touches Hisoka's hair absentmindedly.]

Like what?

[Action]

[cynicism]

Like.. everything. Nothing looked right. It was like there was a wall between me and everything. I couldn't see real colors.

I felt... thick.

[Action]

[idealism]

[Tsuzuki doesn't say anything at first. That doesn't mean he's silent: his emotions are clear and expressive, growing even more so when he empathizes with the isolation Hisoka is describing. It hurts to be that alone, and he doesn't want Hisoka to have to feel that way.]

Thick?